The three most important and necessary words you can say to a survivor are “I believe you”
If a friend or loved one confides in you about being sexually assaulted, it is natural to feel unsure about how to help, but your support is what matters most.
How a survivor decides to handle their situation is their choice. Be open to their needs and respect that they might not know what they need right away. Some tips for supporting include:
- Let them lead the conversation - create a safe space, do not ask questions, and ensure you listen with intent and kindness
- Be patient and remember that healing takes time and looks different for everyone
- Avoid making threats against or confronting the perpetrator.
- Support unconditionally. How someone decides to cope is up to them, but how you respond will play a role in their healing.
- Maintain confidentiality. They came to you because they trust you. It is not your story to share.
- Offer physical support (with consent!). Ask before hugging/touching.
- Do not make promises that you cannot keep.
- Ensure you take care of yourself too.